Day Goes On

Stuck in the wilderness of my own world
Trapped & stuck, wound up in a ball all hurled
An explosive mind, damaged & full of scars
A sudden burst and it shot up into the stars
Lost my way, lost my train of thought
Alone at earth, myself was whom i fought
Silence, a non-audible sense of being
So calm & so mellow, yet such a hollow feeling
My eyes opened, & vision was cleared
Just a mindful mirage, in the distance you reappeared.

Nightmares or Reality?

Awake in my sleep, my visions were not pretty,
My fault was the purpose, i was left with only pity.
Kept feeling the pain, but thought only to refrain,
Maintaining my composure, evil thoughts were slain.
A Path of light came forth visibly, flashing..
Better days in sight, reminiscing moments passing
A realization within myself, maybe morality
Asleep in my nightmares, or was it reality ?

Never Stay Put

Sitting idle trying to figure out what the next stage is,
To my suprize, i wasn't alone, amongst other blank faces.
Staying courageous, keeping my mind sharp turning pages,
Silence breaking from beneath, its time for me to say this.
Rages and outbursts was not where my place is,
Chosen to be out of the box, no more being caged in.

That New New

Some things are best left unspoken
Now in a mess picking up the pieces
A rush of thoughts, feeling so broken
Regather and pace yourself, unfold all creases
Break out of the hole, go strong and..
Start fresh, after all the bad ceases.

White Canvas

Spare a thought, for the one that cares
No point now dwelling, on times once shared
Illustrating myself on a blank piece of paper
I attempt to draw but i just can't seem to shape her
Creating space for something better and greater
Erasing her sooner rather than later
Strokes of assurance, colours so spontaneous
An Art of me , and a clearance of someone extraneous.

For that anonymous commenter and my only commenter, you have talent hit me up on my msn and send me some of your stuff eager to read :)

A Place Made To Be Yours

Moments of treasure are now set aside to rest..
Buried deep, into a gold-filled chest..
Swiped my slate positively blank..
No-one better than myself to thank..
A step made now, is a step less later..
A sorrow to kill & peace to cater..
Day and night, later on will feel so right..
Calm as ever, like stepping into a heaven so bright .

Feel, Hear .

Hands shivering, feeling colder than the breeze which swept through the leave-less trees,
Yet pondering, searching & wondering about everything my eyes see;

Ears twitch to the drops of rain tip tapping on my ceiling,
Heart deepens and sinks any emotion sending me into confused feelings;

Learn to step out of the cold, cover yourself with words or warmth,
A sense of moral amongst you should be swarmed, leaving aside all possibility to be harmed.. !

We observe, we feel, we hear , and in the end your the most important __as simple as that .

Hope Is Your Friend

Walk through your path with a clear conscious,

Nobody else wants this, more than the way you want this;

Dont choke your hope but give it good company,

So at times think ' imma be patient till it comes to me';

I'll wait til fate comes back and runs to me,

Sitting and resting my dome of wonders and visions to be;

Will it happen, wil they prosper into normality,

Or keep being a tease into the world of undesirable reality;

Why face such..?

A flourish of new beginnings always seems to get you awake from your somnolent present,

Yet down the road, it all comes sprawling , comparing it to what "was";
A mind wandering of confused needs and desires, some seem close yet so out of reach,
Washing away memories open unknown paths & contemplation creates a head full of wrath;
Rushing two steps ahead moves you back further than you expect,
Moving too fast forces a lesson that..

PATIENCE TRULY IS A VIRTUE !

It's Amazing, Yeh It's All That

So Many Questions In My Head

Thunder strikes & triggers a feeling somewhere deep inside,
Confining unresolved thoughts into the midst of happenings;

Stuck on a page, wondering whether to keep reading or to skip a chapter,
Words so strong i felt weak as i kept reading and was over-powered;

Made an attempt to freeze the moment and frame it,
A sense so strong that it came longing from what was missing and saved it;

Waves of hope came crashing, but i was left safe on the shore,
Reassuring myself that this is a next step rather than an end .

To Just..

My mind full of blurs as the image of you fades
..into lonesome pages of history which were once wholesome days;

Days pass by, time flies, think of it as abnormal normality?
..Every sleep in the night, every blink of your sight,
think of it as everyday formality;

The sound of silence urges the rush of thoughts into one
confined space
..Limitations which once were have now turned out to be
forever in your chase...

TO JUST LIVE!:)

Vans " angle stripe" Authentic

These are awesome kicks..
plain and fresh !

Invisible or Impenetrable?

I always wondered what it was like to be living in a world where no-one can see you
but still lived like everyone else. But then my mind started thinking logically and
quite confidently confirmed that it would be quite the depressing state of being.
Isolation, loneliness and other synonyms of these lovely words which have
found itself in the midst of my imagination, would most kindly describe the very thought
which i have pointlessly brought up. But this is where you are wrong! =D
It's all not so pointless, although to an extent. Yes being invisible will be quite awesome
and remarkable, but there are downsides like i have mentioned above.

On the other hand, being impenetrable is so much better on many levels. Being impenetrably able to withstand any force in a sense of physical and psychological time, is what i would rather be wanting to do or have the ability to. Looking into reality, invisibility is as rare as Big Foot, but impenetrability would be utmost of somewhat "powers".

Everyday we go through times where we wish we were invisible, but when someone speaks of you in a manner so disturbing, yeah they might not be able to see you, but your GOING TO BE A TOTAL wreck, the next minute, because what they said found itself to cause a stir to the way you feel . On the other hand, using this same situation, but having the "powers" of impenetrability can ensure verbal slurs, psychologically vicious taunts and so on to seep through and past you without creating its territory inside of you :)..
To answer the physical part to this..well..only thing that comes to mind is..GROW muscles and man up lol (sorry could not think of what to write for that)

*this post is again made relevant to certain situations ive come across and sharing it releases stress*

Life's Too Precious To Waste

Past
Said you will, but don't say you have,
Reminiscing and regretting seemed similar;
Time healed my unclear state of mind,
As the clock tick tocked my slate became positive blank;
Present
Self righteousness is used as a shelter from wrong doings,
Goodness strives through the mind but some are left as exceptions;
Initiative is lacking of and the clock is ticking off,
Decisions bunched up and mind full of hesitations;
Future
An objective of succession seemed near,
Approach was made easier as the obstacle was no longer fear;
"Sky high and no looking down" is what pushes him over the line,
Staying simple in the mind confirms everything will be fine;

Life's Too Precious To Waste

His life flashed before him through the words of someone so dear, But he listened and listened well, as the path to undertake became clear; An intuitive insight into reality was made aware of and planning was only the start, Praying and pleading for the right ways, it was real this time as every thought of life resulted in a beating heart;Contemplation was no longer the pass time as initiative has taken over and crushed it into pieces and optimism prevailed once again.

"My poetry is deep, i never fell"- NAS


..just writing about what i feel and also on behalf of a best friend..
..its what we feel..and i decided this is how i should sum it up!..
p.s the sunset is used because i had no other picture i can use for
this certain post above. p.p.s PURPLE IS THE BOMB!

The Fray- Heartless Cover

CLICK TO DOWNLOAD
This track is pretty much ILL as hell!
PEEP it ! don't SLEEP on it !

Trying to Chase the Cool? i Think So!

"A Hole you make is a hole you will have to drive through"- whatever you do or say you will have to live with it as you actions are the only things which back up what you say and saying things which arent quite true..then proving your talk will make it harder for you to walk the walk and in the end, forcing you to fall into the hole you made yourself!"

It's a new place, new faces, and only thing to do is to make acquaintances so that the feeling of
an "outkast"..."loneliness" and "emptyness"can be avoided. The first few meets and greets with those unknown and new can be a determination of what the next meets and greets will result in- First Impression? Quite Right!

This first impression is best achieved and MAINTAINED i repeat MAINTAINED when a character upholds themselve's as themselves and not through the ways of deception and basic element of life- LIES! Yes, most won't be suprised by this element which is practised by many and also by someone who is somewhat a friend..mate..brother..whatever they might think..but i dont think so!

WHY? well its simple, being pushed away, avoided, ignored, put down and repeatedly being hypocritically criticised, just to get that little bit of fresh attention, which they are not used to but
like and therefore resulted in me saying "repeateadly" ...

Why this happens....is totally un-explainable..never have i experienced someone so eager to
feast their time on "attention seeking"..through lies, "ass-kissing"(had no better way to say that haha) and like LUPE said which is also what the only thing i had to say was..

QUIT CHASING THE COOOL! (cool in the negative of senses)

Ok lets slightly divert this to the topicof loyalty..something this person clearly lacks and knows that they do..but does not want to do anything about it. Im actually sort of happy that they dont
care about how much they care as it just gives me a confirmation of one less person i can add to my christmas card list:) ..hypothetically speaking though haha

WHY THIS BOTHERS ME?..[years of friendship, TIMES, talks, shared experiences]..
To the person this can mean as much as a nutshell... .IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE!

And c'mon if you LOVE someone..why deny it?
its totally stupid..!
ok i might sound corney for the next couple of lines..
but isnt it love when you admit that you love someone!
i shall accept that addmittance was done..but also denial
was taking place(more than once) ..why?..again!..to gain attraction from the attractive opposite sex..only to expand the limitation of boundaries between..on a desirable physical level.

QUIET THE SITE ISN'T IT!

Communication of this between myself and the "rebel" of normality is narrowing as time ticks..
all i have to say is..karma always prevails and dont lie to fit in..you'll either be accepted or
realise that it isnt for you!:)

"AN OBSCENE OBSESSION for the "coolest" "


x__x___x___x___x___x___x

OH MY GOD!

Don't Get Me Started On These
Current Status: SPEECHLESS

Purple Kickz!

Weird fetish for purple..and also for kicks..and if you put them together you basically get a combo which is orgasmically beautifull...also how i wanted to describe these shoes..orgasmically beautiful..simple and just the way its supposed to be.

Mind Running Free?..

Well it can be that my mind is running free,
but lets just say that im freeing my mind of
doubts and ideas which are fictional and those
which never prevailed. No, it wasnt me dreaming,,
nor me failing to prevail but just letting more opportunities
open my way. Yes it might be hard to deal with loss, and
letting go may also be an emotional trek, but its all worth it in
the end, as you always end up with something better.
A simple saying such as " 1st the WORST, and 2nd the
BEST" can be the little motivation to loosen your grip on
memories which should stay as memories and grasp
your desires on something which you feel might be more
satisfying, worth it and which will do you good rather than
the other.

How good this feels just letting thoughts which i dont want prolonging in my mind is unexplainable. I can admittedly say im feeling light headed, and i can prescribe this to all the stoners who go for the light headed effect. Only advantage of my strategy is you dont kill brain cells..and you have money left over for those dope kicks that seems to come out every now and then:) haha

New Kid Cudi!

Kid Cudi- Sky May Fall(CLICK TO DOWNLOAD!!!)

This song is crazy, loving this raw, straight to the point Kid Cudi music! =D
This track is also the song which is used in the upcoming Transformers Movie!
Down right fresh stuff!

Cause youre my sun..set set set!!!! =D

My room has never looked better! And never have i felt so at peace
and so i decided this was a relevant or should i say an important topic
i can share with y'al!=)

I was on the phone to a friend before and told her,
"mad!..im getting a real cool sunset into my
bedroom(yeh im on the first floor).."

Then i sat down, put on some Jackie Boyz,
who is arguably the best underground RNB
which can without doubt be the best RNB on
mainstream as well, but sadly they are not signed
for some stupid reason..

Anyway moving on, the sunlight reflecting around
my white painted walls, just made my whole day better.
No im not "HOMO", i just enjoy the natural aspects of
life haha..YEH IN YOUR FACE TECHNOLOGY :| (umm yeh cant live without both i guess!)
It(sunset) just made my normal and boring routine
of sitting down on my computer for hours with music
playing, Millions times worth doing.

If only i lived in like antarctica and half my year i wouldnt
need to worry about a sunset..wait..if theres sun 24/7..for
6 months..that means no sunset..aw damn it! =[ lol

Ok yes i think my room is a better option and a MUCH more convenient place to say.

Blank Slate

Yes!..my mind is a blank slate at the moment and i cannot think of what to write about..
post below is just an experience and lesson ive learnt lately:)..
But other than that, i have nothing to widen your eyes and go wow to! lol

This is for people who i adore:
Opal- fully sick bitch..love you!
Mary- esse's for life..(quit teasing my hair lol)

Mr.Avayy Feels Like..

Ok, so its hard to say what im feeling, cause im doing it tough, and details, you dont need to know but if you want, you can listen in on my VENT, BITCH, CRY, SULK or whatever you would like to call it. Ataching yourself to something which i found out is not the way to actually deal with life in general. Like it, Love it, but making SOMETHING as your maximum above yourself is risky.
If you end up losing this "SOMEthing" you have attached yourself with, things for you for a long time will be hard to come by. YOU is first, and they and that isn't!!!

Some Music Sites Which You Might Want In Your Database!..

http://loserboimusic.blogspot.com/ - RNB
http://hear-it-first.net - HIPHOP/RAP
http://gowherehiphop.com/ - Self explanatory lol
http://www.jololouie.com/- HipHop and RNB

also save this:
http://www.kanyeuniversecity.com/blog/

THE MAN HIMSELF..updates it every day!..
very interesting..!=D

Dope Shirt

I found this shirt which i reckon is the FUNK!..
saw it on Kanye's blog of some brand which i never heard of
or will be purchasing anytime soon lol
BUT this shirt, yes is sweeet!

Imperial Skateboard P aka Pharrell!

The "best dressed man" arriving in Australia a few days ago, to perform in the Future Music Festival. I am so guttered that i did not purchase tickets for this day, although i went agaisnt buying tickets for N.E.R.D concert (disappointed with their Seeing Sounds album).

Also, a true story, i cut up some old jeans i had lying around and thought that instead of buying this was the best option. After i realised that i didnt do it well lol..so i threw them away.
Then, i was peepin through some pictures of pharrell and noticed that he was wearing the same type of shorts and yes once again..GUTTERED!..p.s i care about this stuff <>

*Can I Have It Like That?

Kick..Push...Coast

At the start of the year, i had no idea what my year was to be, and also the following years to come. I guess its fair to say that, what i do now, will determine, not me, but my future. But i had it tough, maybe not as bad as others, but also certainly not as good as those who prevailed. No university, no motivation, and left overseas, feeling homesick, and confused about the little options i had to choose from.

"Just a rebel to the world, with no place to be" - L.F

Aspirations seemed a long shot, desires went longing and still are, and my first option which left me no choice was to AGAIN start fresh. I say "again" because, ive had many of these remedies(mostly failed ). But this was more to me...it was now or never. As i was on the plane back, i used my mp3 as a last resort to treat my common case of boredom which normally hits you while your travelling, if you have taken the time to notice lol. Skipping through the songs which i was totally sick of(all of them), didnt know what to listen to. So i made myself patient, regathered and let my mp3 do its job. It did more than that, it gave me a time of reflection. My ear drums were vibrating and my surroundings seemed blind to my ears and def to eyes..yes i wrote right and u read right:)
Kick, Push..Kick, Push...KICK PUSH COASSST!..
Suddenly i started analysing the songs i was listening to, relating them to my current situation of frustration, confusion and at that time heartbreak. The jam which stood out was kick push and coast by yours truly , Mr.fiasco.

A fresh start to my now "adult life" , and the first thing to do on my list is to KICK..
Kick emphasises a chance with certainty, like jumping off a cliff with a safety harness and jumping into an ocean knowing how to swim 100%.

Push showed me the struggle which is to be made to smooth sail in the aftermath of my kicking(trying, efforts and strive). "So imma force my will, like the force i will"- L.F

Coast in this sense, can play itself and if my kicking and pushing was an effort made without regrets, coasting is my only option. As i said in my previous post, effort never goes unrewarded.

"Labelled a misfit, a bandit"- Lupe Fiasco "When i reign supreme in my own glory, they* won't be able to stand it"- Mr.Avayyy

Lupe Fiasco- Kick Push
http://www.zshare.net/audio/55962592bbfef302/

Kid Cudi- Day n Nite

I love this song...enough said

I LOOK FOR PEACE, BUT SEE, I DONT ATTAIN!__

oh and here's Kid Cudi's new one ft Wale called "Look Up In The Stars"
http://www.zshare.net/audio/55948059f5926956/

OMFG!

Tell me you wouldn't give a hand or leg for a pair of these, cos i know i would!
I dont think anyone deserves to wear these, with the exception of Mr.Avayy..
yes?..YES..i agree too:D lol

Can't Tell Me Nothing__

Never let anyone look down on you. Every single person who looks to down on a person should be stomped on, wrapped in a plastic bag and thrown into the indian ocean. Certain people say things and dont realise how much it hurts an individual they have commented on and the choices they(verbal victim) take in result of such harsh words. I guess we have to take the negative with the positive, but why not take all of it as positive and treat the negative words of people bringing you down into something positive. Most of the time these low-lifes who think its wonderful to look down on someone, often only do so to hide their own insecurities.

If your'e striving towards a personal goal and I know i am, your own self confidence and admiration in what your'e rying to achieve wil get you there. As Kanye said -" If you have a dream, reach for the stars, cos' if u fall, u land on a cloud". Those who speak non-sense are those who dont appreciate others and are non-beleivers of themselves, so they look to bring us down the path of "uncertainty" and "failure". Be strong, be a soldier, your a child of god, so rebel agaisnt evil.

I listen to music, not because the beat is awesome, and not because its number 1 on the billboard charts. I listen to music, to take in what the artist is saying and what message he/she is trying to give me. Music is a very large part of the motivation which is getting me where i want to in the long run. Artists like common, kanye west, nas, consequence, talib kweli, lupe fiasco, bring light into my uncertain world and show me that there is possibility of what i want and need. Have an escape, use things you love to help you through. I developed a rare habit of reading, well its rare for me and now frankly i love, which then lead me to writing and here i am lol. I read somewhere while i was overseas and was being homesick, which resulted in me having time to myself and waiting very anxiously for my plane back, that, if you really want something, and that too for all the right reasons, you WILL get it. It all depends on how hard you TRY, how much you CARE, and how BADLY you want it. Its a basic human quality, showing that effort gives results, full stop.

So to end off, whenever someone catches the "egotistical" elevator on the "floor" above you, say to yourself, CANT TELL ME NOTHING....and carry on with your reaching for the stars.

EGO HAS LANDED?

Why do they make it sound like yeezy is egotistical and that he puts himself on a pedestal over others? I think hes just proud of his achievements, and you know what?..i dont blame the guy..evergreen talent for which i am 100% supportive of:)

So Bright and Freshhhhh! ....i dig i dig

I was thinking, i have nothing yellow in my plethora of oh so wonderful line of clothing in my cupboard but i think we can make this work(if i ever get em ahaha)

i neeed a job mayneeeee=[ lol

Digital Underground- Humpty Hump

This song makes you wana do the um....humpty hump?..

AH DO THE HUMPTY HUMP! lol

just a classic track which gets me going at boring times, such as NOW-_-

Heard Em(HER) Say_

"We're all self-conscious im just the first to admit it"- Kanye

Everyday we deal with him and her, and worry ourselves about what he say, she say etc.
Then without knowing associate ourselves in this same activity, call it common behaviour.. i call it purposeful coincidence. If you keep to yourself and in your confined space, leaving your self- confidence to keep you upto date with daily obstacle and challenges, being self concsious can be changed self pride, self image and how we wish to portray ourselves as an individual to the society in general. The point which im getting to is that before worrying about what other people have to say about you as an individual, change yourself to deal wih the bullshit coming your way making you , well, self- conscious!

Theres was a Ms.Anonomymous, and was at the time a close companion, best friend, along those lines. Nothing more than that, well at least on a mutual level, because her charisma basically got the best of me. To my face, all was well and good, once i walked away into my own world leaving her out of the picture with the rest of the world....personal conversations between us had been made public, and assumptions, judgments, and a change in the way people had towards me differed.
What i later found out was that, those publicly made statements about "moi" were infact transformed and weaved into more than what it truthfully was. Submission was never in the picture for me and nor was addmittance to something which i had not done. The rumors were there and then, but i had prolonged them, by not carrying them as a burden on my shoulders. If someone had to approach me with these statements id rightfully dismiss all , well at least all of which is not true and go about my own business, not letting 'em bring me down. This companion was forever pushed away, as trust was never seen as a catalyst for a revival in friendship. To this day, self pride, self image and self confidence , kept me in my senses and stopped me from doing the same. Some call it "copying" and more or less - conformity(conforming to backstabbing), so in plain words getting revenge. That would have just been messing up my own self and letting her get the best of me. But yes i never "conformed" and "copied" and got "revenge" lol, i took it day by day until she was in the "other side of the glass of my memorie's musuem".

If your wondering why i speak of all this, getting over certain situations doesnt just happen and this is one way of getting rid of something which is no longer wanted and will never be remembered, and thats to speak all you can and be, so...--> Stay True and believe, if it doesnt work, watch Obama's inaugration lol Worked for me:P

YES WE CAN!!!!!

Mercedes Benz Fashion Week

Yeezy and his man Cudi doing their thing next to a short haired caucasian woman whom i do not know lol. But yes i despise australia for not selling retro jordans(Kid Cudi is wearing them) in major outlets, let alone small shops, which leaves me only to get them from the internet and i dont like doing that so im fucked. =[ lol

Kanye West ft Kid Cudi- Welcome To Heartbreak

KANYE WEST "Welcome To Heartbreak" Directed by Nabil from nabil elderkin on Vimeo.

This song is deadset one of the finest tracks ive heard, and hey, its staright to the point..No beating around the bush for yeezy..peep it!
Holy Mother of Dope, diggin that jumper yeezy rockin at the star! (L)

FreshStart?

Its an hour on in and one of my top Itunes albums have been banging on my eardrums without rest, over and over echoeing " you accused me let me testify..". Yeah, its common's basement evolution. You can blame his poetic and rhythmatic explosions of art through the form of music, which made me the very person i am now in relation to my way i think, feel and analyse all.

Basically, i was once what i hate now (typical teenage kids who feast on stereotypes which only make them look like dipshits and not realise values of being a sraight forward human being). I would'nt say ive changed for the better but not for the worse neither.

Y'all probably thinking hes saying blah blah..well guess what..its exactly what i think your thinking while reading my blog, but i do appreciate your time haha

So how about that Glow in the Dark 08 tour of sydney. Kanye and Nas ripped it up, and of course kid cudi, cons and scribe made it worthwhile. Im only speaking of this now as i havent had a chance to say how wonderful of a night it was to witness, geniuses at work. It was fresh as hell, and night not to be forgotten. For those who didnt attend, i feel for you but dont really blame you as you still are probably trying to figure out what Kanye is talking about on his infamous tracks from the album Graduation.

Moving on, the new year wasnt celebrated to expectancy but did surpass the bare minimum level of fun. And yes it was spent over seas and also a mishap of mine made my start to my year miserable, but im pulling through(refer to name--> CHILD REBEL SOLDIER) haha
Im actually behind on my underground tracks but am slowly getting back on track as my daddy just bought me a new lcd and have been glued to it since(if your wondering..its for my computer). 22 inch w0oo0p w00oop lol

Now, just focused on education as im still a child and have much to learn still. But having a little fun here and there as rebellion is part of being a child and learning through experiences only makes me a soldier.

Im out sleepy az hell
peace in due time!:)

Skateboard-P Lookin Fresh Az Hell

haha pharell rocking clown jeans..i dig i dig!
but i guess only he can pull them off!

One Day It'll All Make Sense

We wonder why we do such things to make ourselves feel good and at full satisfaction. Lets keep on a general note for a second, just to avoid those stereotypical thinking teenage fanatics whose first brain function is to judge, judge and judge.
But yeah we do all this mish mash, and then think of the negatives, and what people would think of you, and how it would make you look.Why complicate your world with such doubts and remedies when you can run through your journey(life)with a blank slate(mind)and draw your own picture rather than letting others rub it out and fill their own colours in.

The name is Avi, age is unnecessary and nationality is irrelevant, although i love my music, love making myself look dope haha, and dont care about what YOU say:)
One thing you will see this blog filled with is ish* about Kanye West, yes Kanye West. Only the biggest genius with the most narrow yet wide artistical mindframe, which i believe.
Hope y'all enjoy and im due again in due time!